Tuesday, August 3, 2010


i woke up the other morning, stretched and was promptly stricken by a charlie horse. in my state of panic to get up and walk it out, i became tangled in the sheet and fell to the floor. this disturbs me on more than one level. first, charlie horses are stupid and painful. secondly, i must now face the fact that i have reached the age where i suffer from charlie horses. damn.

charlie horses are caused by low potassium so i set out for the kitchen to make myself a banana smoothie. the bananas are frozen so that the smoothie takes on the wonderful consistency of ice cream. i put all the ingredients into the blender and let it do its magic. when i poured the smoothie into my glass, the still whole, frozen banana hit the rim and fell to the floor. it fell to the fucking floor!! no potassium and my smoothie was bland.

days and days and days into this heat and i am murderously weary of it. i walk and walk and walk; conducting tours in the thick air, sweating out my body weight so that no matter how much water i consume, i still can only manage to urinate once or twice a day. my stomach is water logged and still the sweat rolls down my face.

is there anyone out there that practices voodoo or knows the secrets of native american rain dances?? if so, please call down the merciful, cooling, blessed rain onto our febrile brows...we who writhe in hellish agony,screaming out from parched throats. it is enough to make me rethink my climate choice.

1 comment:

judyb said...

Sorry,I had to laugh imagining the flying frozen banana.

Try apricots or sweet potatoes for dinner.

It's a shame that you have to work out in this heat, it's the worst ever.

Saying a little prayer for your health daily.